I had my first daughter in 1993. I had a Cesarean Section, due in part to a cascade of medical interventions (see that story elsewhere on this site). I was pregnant with my second daughter in 1997. I knew I wanted to do things differently this time.

Three weeks before she was due, my doctor did an ultrasound to find out how big she was (my first daughter was over 10 pounds!). He thought she was looking like 8 pounds already (of course, ultrasounds have a huge margin of error in predicting exact size of the baby) and since babies gain over 1/2 pound a week, he recommended induction at 38 weeks to make sure she's small enough that you can have a successful VBAC. Knowing what I know now, I consider this faulty medical advice and would not consider an induction at 38 weeks.

Well, one week later at 38 weeks, she decided to come on her own! I woke up one morning and was getting my older daughter ready for pre-school and kept feeling like I was really constipated. I would go and sit on the toilet and nothing would happen. After doing this four or five times, I clued in to the fact that I was doing it every 8-10 minutes. Hmmm ... looks like labor contractions.

I spent that whole day, from 8 a.m. to 10 p.m., doing what you're supposed to do in early labor -- alternating rest and relaxation with labor-stimulating activity and distractions, eating light meals throughout the day and remaining well-hydrated.

We walked to the mall at lunchtime with some friends. Along the walk, I would stop every five minutes and breathe through a contraction. Then we would walk onwards. Afterwards, I went home and packed, as we were getting ready to move.

At 9 that night, we were out to dinner with those same friends. At the beginning of the meal, I was chatty and interacting except during contractions. By the end of the meal, even between contractions I didn't want to be disturbed by anything else. We went home and the contractions started getting much more painful. I got into the bathtub with my daughter and it didn't help; they still hurt. I decided to go to the hospital then, for an epidural. When we got to the hospital, contractions were four minutes apart. I was 4 centimeters dilated.

After the epidural, I labored all night with my husband and mother-in-law there. The epidural gave pain relief, but I could still feel the contractions. Twelve hours later, at 10:30 the following morning, I was 5 centimeters dilated. This was very discouraging, as in my first labor I had never dilated all the way. I went to sleep for 30 minutes and when I woke up, I said, Something's very different. The nurse said something about checking me in a little while and I said, No, something is very different. I think you need to check me now. She did and I was at 10 centimeters.

The doctor and nurse prepped very quickly and 15 minutes and three pushes later, Isabel was born! So, it took me 26 hours to get to 5 centimeters, but 30 minutes to go from 5-10 and then just a few pushes for an 8-pound, 6-ounce girl. She was two weeks early, but in perfect rosy health.

This was much more like the labor I had hoped for than I had with my first baby. I was glad I had waited to go to the hospital as long as I had. I was glad I waited for the dilation to happen rather than fretting that it hadn't happened yet.

What would I do if I had a third baby? A homebirth with a doula or two. As long as pain medication is an option for me, I will take it, but if I were home, I know that I could find a way to make it through. Part of it is a willingness to surrender to the process and work with the pain. You know that natural endorphins will eventually kick in and help with the pain if you create an environment where that's possible. How do I know that? Now I'm a doula and I have watched many women labor without pain medication succeed in the natural births they have planned. And I know that part of the reason they can do that is having people around them who know they can do that. Read Birthing from Within for lots more thoughts on this.